It's been a rough month...

First of all, we've been really busy. Vacation Bible School, other activities, archery, etc. This summer has been one of the busiest I've had. I enjoy being busy, but I also enjoy having absolutely NOTHING to do.

I've been having trouble sleeping. I miss my dad. During the day, I can keep busy and not have to think about how July/August of 2005 was when my dad was here dying of cancer. But at night, I can't stop thinking about it. Maybe writing about it will help get it off my chest. I usually have upbeat posts here on my blog, but I guess a blog is supposed to be for anything, right?

It just seem so unfair. Of course, I know God has a plan for everyone, and I'm not supposed to even begin to understand why He takes certain people and not others. I trust in God's wisdom, even if I don't understand it or even like it.

There are things I'm grateful for. I'm grateful that I got to spend 5 weeks with my dad before he died. We didn't speak much, but we didn't have to. Just being with him was enough. Sometimes I feel guilty for having to put him into a hospice, but doing that was a good decision. I could not have taken care of him properly here at home. I couldn't lift him or safely get him out of bed. I don't think he would have wanted me to have to perform the duties that are necessary when someone is close to death. The hospice nurses were wonderful with him, and he even flirted with them while he could. I was there every day. And I truly think he didn't want us to be there when he died. That's just how he was.

My dad taught me some things as well. Going through that experience has taught me some things about myself that I didn't know. I'm strong. I can get through anything. Even when I'm scared witless, I can still face whatever obstacles this life gives me. My dad would be proud of that.

Anyway...I know this is a rambling post. If you got this far, Bless you! I really needed to get this out.

Have a great weekend!

PS...has anyone seen my mojo???? :)